One Happy Thing, One Funny/Odd Thing, and One Cute Thing

I am in a very good mood today because this morning I called and paid off our vacation. Yippie! It's 59 days away and I can hardly wait. September should be a happy month, because my brother gets married, so there will be wedding hoop la and then less than a week after that, we leave for vacation. That is good stuff.

Other good stuff - I found sandals! I decided go with Columbia Sun Trax. I probably looked at hundreds of sandals online and in stores. Silly. But, my high maintenance feet are finally satisfied. Anyway, I was wearing the sandals today, which made me even more excited for vacation, because the whole reason I was searching for new sandals was for vacation.



Anyway, since I got new sandals and have also gotten some new clothes over the past couple months, I decided that I should give our closet a serious purge. I often go through the closet to look for stuff to get rid of, but usually I am very nice about it. This time, I decided that if I haven't worn it during the last year, or if I wore it, but felt uncomfortable/self conscious/stupid in it, then it also needs to go. That part was harder because some of the stuff I have is very nice, but I just never wear it because I don't feel nice in it. Anyway, I had just started on that when Jesse got home, and he decided that he should also give his side of the closet a good purge. So, he joined me. He looked really funny while doing this, because he was only wearing his boxers, and then he decided to put on one of my hats...and he was serious the whole time. Not like he was making jokes about it. He just went about his business as if he was wearing something normal...like clothes...and a hat made for men. Anyway, I found the scene to be very peculiar and funny, so I took a picture. (No worries, all you see is shoulders up!) He totally reminded me of some beatnik poet or something.



After the purging, we spent most of the day outside. It's unusually cool for July. Horton kept trying to find a place by us, but our chairs were on the rocks. He would lay down and then get back up, trying a new spot on the rocks, but just couldn't get comfy. So, I pulled a cushion off one of the chairs, and he quickly caught on to what I was doing and found a very nice spot for himself. And so of course, I took a picture, just in case anyone who reads my blog has not yet figured out that I think I have the two cutest dogs in the whole wide world.

Getting All Practical Now That I've Ditched Art Again.

So, now that I'm back to psychology, and graduation is looming nearer...

If I want to go to grad school, I've got to get my stuff together this fall to meet application deadlines and what not. I'm looking into a couple research internships right now and studying for the GRE. I'm skeptical about it all. There are really only two programs that I am interested in applying for, and one of them accepts less than 5% of applicants. I'm not sure what the odds are for the other program. Nonetheless, it's competitive. If I can't find my way into some research experience this fall, then I may not even bother applying. I'm pretty sure that without that piece, I would be wasting my time. So, for now, I'm anxiously awaiting follow-up e-mails and what not to see whether or not the research stuff can work out. I probably won't know for a couple weeks yet.

I think I'm pretty okay no matter how it all pans out. After all, there are also a lot of positives to not going to grad school and just working. And a PhD is a pretty heavy investment in career. I'm not sure what that would mean for us in terms of family and kids. So I guess really, I'd be super excited if grad school worked out, but in some ways, I suppose I'd be relieved if it doesn't. So, either way comes with some positive emotions.

Anyway, in case you're wondering what programs I am looking at - one is clinical psych with a health emphasis and the other is just straight up sociology.

For now though, I don't even know for sure that I am applying. I wait.

Getting All Philosophical About Art Again.

So for those who don't know, I changed my major back to psychology. Basically
1) I'll be done way faster, which means 2) I'll borrow less money and 3) I like art, but half the time when I am doing assignments and projects, I don't see it as art; it's just completing a task. As one of my instructors put it to me (with a sigh) "that's just the nature of art school" - so I decided to (once again) stop. I think hope, that this time, I won't worry about what I left behind. There was always that "what if" surrounding my decision to leave the art institute. Now, I can say that while I like making art, wading through the politics of it is simply not worth it enough for me.

A friend in Colorado, after telling him that I had quit the institute, said to me something along the lines of, "it's better that you got out before it killed that in you" - that being the innocence of it all...thinking that you can actually just make art for art's sake....that technical skills and talent matter... He had graduated from an art institute, and it was years before he was able to find the artist in him again - in fact, I believe he still is recovering it and it's somehow older, more skeptical than it used to be. I've found that to be true of many art institute graduates that I know.

It reminds me of my faith journey where you start out so innocent. Somewhere along the line though, you get knocked around and realize that things aren't as you believed, and you learn to toughen up. Then, once you realize how hard you are, though you do your best to become soft again, you know you'll never go back to that place where you really believe in the simplicity and purity of it all.

So then, art can be the one area of my life where I am fine to stay a child.

Running Total: Garden Savings

Here's my geeky project of the summer.

I decided I am going to keep a running total of the "worth" of my gardens. I'm going to keep track on here, because otherwise, I know I'll lose whatever piece of paper I start writing it on.

Here are my rules: If the item is offered in the organic section of the grocery store, I am using that price since I do the gardens organically and that is the most comparable product. If they don't carry the organic version, then I will just use whatever price the regular version is. I am pulling the prices off the website of the grocery store that we used to shop at in Colorado, so there is probably some slight variation for location, but overall, the pricing there is pretty similar to the midwest as far as produce.

I'll subtract all of my costs from the get-go because they are fixed, so I know most of them now. Any seeds/plants not listed, I got starts or seeds from various friends/family, so they were free. And technically, I bought most of this stuff with a gift card that I got for my birthday, so I suppose in that way, it was all free.

sugar snap seeds = 1.07

bibb lettuce seeds = 2.19

romaine seeds = 2.19

spinach seeds = 1.07

oregano seeds = 1.07

strawberry plants = 9.99

green bean seeds = 1.07

kohlrabi seeds = 1.97

manure/soil admendments = 16.00 (high I think, because I compost, so we don't buy much)

cost of watering gardens for 20 weeks = $25.00?? (I think that is a pretty high estimate also)

I also spend a lot of time out there, but I'm not factoring that as a cost, because to me, it's free entertainment/exercise and would lean more on the profit side.

Total Costs = 61.62

Now, so far what I have harvested:

6 lbs of sugar snap peas at 4.99/lb = 29.94

1 lb. of strawberries = 4.99

Bibb lettuce at 1.99/bunch = 23.88

Romaine lettuce at 2.29/bunch = 27.48

Spinach, we probably ate 4 bunches fresh at 1.99/bunch and I froze 10 bags at 1.29 for 10 oz. frozen spinach (off brand price because that is what I would buy) = 20.86

Fresh Chives, .66 oz at 2.79. I probably have at least 3-4 oz. = 8.45

Fresh oregano, .66 oz. at 2.79 and I have a TON of oregano = 21.14

Can't find a price on lemon balm, so I'll exclude that.

Kolhrabi 5 bunches at 1.75/bunch = 8.75

Total value of produce as of today = 145.49

Total Garden Value As of Today = 83.90

Still to add - green beans, more strawberries, tomatoes, basil...and whatever I decide to put in for fall crops.

Not a bad start to the summer.

More Pictures

It has been a photo extravaganza lately on here! Might as well keep it going with some photos from yesterday when I was up at my Grandpa's house celebrating both his birthday and Independence Day.

The birthday boy himself keeping an eye on the grill. He was wearing an apron that said "Grill Sergeant". (Funny if you know him.)


Two of my cousins getting creative with duct tape and firecrackers. I'm telling you, every year, I am amazed that everyone walks away with their eyebrows fully intact and we have no trips to the ER. When we were kids, I thought we were pretty creative with the firecrackers and tin cans, but these days, things have evolved way past tin cans.


They were putting their homemade "bombs" in the wheelbarrow and then lighting them. My Grandpa was down there wearing his headphone ear thingies just like the ones they wear out on the tarmac. I thought that was pretty funny.


Me, my mom, and my almost sister-in-law. I took a bunch of self-photos because every time I hand this little camera to someone else, they seem to get confused. It's older, so you still have to actually look through the viewfinder instead of seeing where you are shooting display on the screen, and people don't seem to get the concept of viewfinders that you actually put your eye to anymore. It ends up taking a while just to get one photo, so I figured it's easier to just squeeze into the shot and shoot them myself.



My brother and I.


When I got home, Jesse had just woken up from a nap. We kept retaking this photo, thinking he would look normal in the next one, but he just looked drugged in all of them. It makes me laugh.

Anyway, we debated about what to do for the evening, and decided to just chill out, so I ran to the store to get stuff for salsa and gauc, and picked up Charlie Wilson's War from Redbox (pretty good, and quite a timely commentary for present day). We watched that and then took the dogs for a walk. We ended up chatting with a lady down the street for a while, and found out that her vet gives her Xanax to give to her dog on the 4th. We are now thinking that may be worth a shot to give to Abe before thunderstorms. The doggie dosage is really high compared to humans though, so I'm a bit nervous about it. I think we may ease him into it slowly. In any case, after that, we went down to the park and I rode my bike while Jesse rollerbladed. The park was pretty empty, which was nice because usually the path is busy. We even saw a doe, who was quite intent on munching her grass while watching us. When we got home, Horton was a bit nervous from the noise and lights, so he stuck very close to us, and Abe panted and paced to make sure that we knew something was going on. Today, they are both very happy boys now that it's all over.

Some Photos

Jesse's mom has been here the last couple days. Here are a few photos...

The evening she got in, we grilled out pizza and my mom came down for a visit. The dogs enjoyed hanging out with us in the backyard.


Today, she made us roll kuchen. Mmmmm....


Jesse did a nice job frying them...


and was very kind when I asked him to turn on the fan so that the grease didn't fill the air....


He also did an excellent job eating them.


And a couple photos just because...

Dusting off my soap box...

I didn't go to church over the weekend, or any weekend recently for that matter, but none the less, I have a sermon! Now excuse me as I climb my soapbox... =)

For the summer, our small group is rotating leaders and topics. Jesse and I decided that for our week, we want to speak on Darfur. In preparing for it, I ordered a DVD off the website, Save Darfur. I get updates from this site often and it's a great resource for learning about the situation, as well as ideas for action. Definitely check it out, and even better, sign a petition there and then sign up for their e-mail updates that will let you know about other news regarding Darfur and further ideas of action that you can take.

In any case, the DVD is quite well done. It breeches the subject by looking at three major world religions - Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, and what their scriptures say about it. There were a number of quotes on the DVD that really struck me, that I thought I'd share here.

The great religions differ in the way they understand the relationship between humans and God. They do not differ in the way they understand the relationship between human beings and one another. Each one of those faiths says if someone else is suffering, that is my responsibility, and that is really what binds Jews, Christians and Muslims together. We have the same kind of ethic. The ethic of responsibility. -Sir Jonathan Sacks

Over the past few years, especially since leaving Mercy Ships, I've done a lot of thinking about what the real issues in this world are. I've been disappointed in the way that many Christian resources are utilized, and what "causes" rally the most attention and money. Seems like gay marriage, school curriculum regarding evolution, and issues like that receive a very large portion of our time and energy. If you ask someone in church about gay marriage, they would probably at least know the general issue and some legislation regarding it. If you ask someone in church about Darfur, it's iffy whether or not they would even be able to tell you where Darfur is located. Things like that really sadden. I feel like we put a lot of time into "defending" the wrong thing. He never defended himself, and I don't believe He needs us to defend him, which I feel is exactly what people are trying to do when they get all worked up over gay rights and "protecting" the sanctity of marriage or evolution being taught in schools and "protecting the truth". But never did God say "protect me, defend me, look after me." However, in regards to other humans, He did say:

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.

So, with issues and legislation, I have to ask, who is it we are trying to defend, and do they really need defending? I would like the Christian community to take a good, hard look at that question, and see if perhaps, there isn't someone being overlooked while we are busy trying to "protect" our Protector.

In regards to Darfur, there is a lot of legislation in the works, and I wish that it was receiving as much attention as things like gay marriage legislation. On the positive side, however, the activists that are out there are making a difference. In a very, very, rare moment in US history, Clinton, Obama, and McCain issued a joint statement accusing the Sudanese government of their atrocities and warning that whoever the next President is will not ignore their actions. I firmly believe this statement was a result of activists writing letters, having rallies and protests. In politics, the pressure to please the public is so great, that if we demand something, it will not be ignored. And I want more people to demand that the people of Darfur get help. I'm not speaking merely of the US government here. I'm speaking of the entire world, and in particular, the United Nations. While talks have happened, some legislation has been signed, the actions are often slow. If the public pressure were greater, however, I think the action would be more swift. And this is a case that needs swift action. History shows, these things snowball. And Darfur is definitely rolling fast. I think it's so important to remember.

Hitler was meeting with his most powerful advisers...and they were discussing how to start the Holocaust, and one of his advisers say, "But what about the Armenian genocide?" and his answer...was "But who remembers the Armenian genocide?" - Vicken Aykazian

It was the Armenians, it was the Jews, it was the Tutsis, it is the people of Darfur, and someday, it could be your people and it could be my people. So don't forget.

One month before the terrible genocide in Rwanda, the United Nations man on the spot warned that there was a real risk of genocide and the world did nothing, and one month later, over a period of 100 days, 800,000 people were murdered. -Sir Jonathan Sacks

I think we often underestimate the power of our own humanity. 100 days, 800,000 people. That proves the power. Now imagine that on a good scale. What we do matters. It matters on a small scale, and it matters on a large scale. It matters right now. And it matters for the future.

We change the world one life at a time, one day at a time, one act at a time. There really is no other way. -Sir Jonathan Sacks

So today, let's each do our act. Let's remember our history. Let's take a good, hard look at our present. Let's say a prayer. Let's take five minutes to sign a petition, to write a letter, to tell someone else. Let's look into divestment. But let's not stay silent. Let's not ignore those who desperately need our voice and our defense.

If I have a chance to say something for my brother, I'm praying all days for you - Moheamed Dafella Ishag, (Darfur survivor speaking of his brother, who was murdered by the janjaweed).

My Bike and Other Random Objects

This is a bad photo of my most recent purchase that I am very excited about:



I have been wanting a bike for a few months now, and have been casually browsing craigslist looking at them to see how much used bikes cost. I didn't think I'd be getting one anytime soon, because I quickly realized that used bikes still go pretty high. Anyway, I got super excited when I saw this bike because not only is it old-fashioned, which I really wanted, but even better, it was 10 bucks! At that price, I decided I couldn't pass it up. I am hoping that it will be a good investment in exercise and saving gas money. (We filled up our Passport for 65 bucks today...ouch.) Anyway, Jesse and I went down to the park by our house and I rode my bike while he rollerbladed. For once, I can actually keep up with him on the Rollerblades! We used to go a lot together in Colorado, but he would always have to go slower for me. Now with me on the bike instead of my Rollerblades, Jesse can actually go at a decent pace and not have to worry about leaving me in the dust. From our house, it's about two miles to the grocery store, and I am hoping that I can work my way up to being able to ride my bike there instead of driving to get groceries each week. It would be a piece of cake if it were flat, but it's two miles of decently steep hills. We'll see how that one goes. In the meantime, I can at least use it for the many quick runs we do right by our house, like getting a Redbox movie.

In other happy product news, I am pleased to give an update on the lion wrinkle battle. I started using Avon's Intensive A Line Treatment with the RetroActive cream, and I am now a loyal customer. It gets my official best-product-I-have-purchased-in-a-very-long-time title. Now I just hope Avon doesn't discontinue it.

My product-that-I-don't-really-want-but-I-need-anyway is a GRE study guide. I am still not sure if I want to go to grad school or not, but I think I should at least apply and see if it's even an option. Then I can make my decision. As such, I need to take the GRE relatively soon. I did some practice questions online and pretty much bombed them. Which means, I really need to study.

My on-the-search-for product is a pair of sandals. Last year on vacation, I ended up wearing my 3 dollar flip flops the whole time because the other shoes I brought gave me blisters on the back of my ankle before we even got to the park. The flip flops also gave me blisters between my toes, but at least it took a good 6 or 7 hours before making them. Anyway, due to this predicament, my feet were very sad during and after vacation. I decided this year, I need to just buck up and get a pair of decent fitting sandals that I can actually walk in for long distances without blisters, back pain, or something else that makes me whine to Jesse. You would think this would be a relatively easy thing to find. But no. I have come to the conclusion that I have extremely high maintenance feet.

For now, I am off to spend some time with my recent consuming-mass-quantities-of product: lentils. Cheap. And they make yummy tacos.

Starting the Day with a Laugh

Sometimes big issues are so serious that you just need a new take on them...

Grandpa Abe Part II

Abe's cart arrived earlier this week, and Jesse and I were very excited. We have been slowly working with Abe getting him used to it and making the adjustments so that it fits him right. Usually, it comes shipped fully assembled set to your dog's measurements, but since we got it used, the guy took it apart to ship it, and also, everything that was still together was set for his dog, so we are still figuring out how to get it right for Abe. He has been very patient as we put him in and out of it and change it around. He has gotten a ton of treats in the process, and now he equates the cart with food. As soon as we put him in it, he starts looking up and sniffing our hand, trying to find his treat. We have only played in the backyard so far because we want it to be a perfect fit before we take him on a longer walk with it. I think we got the back part right, and now we are working on the front harness part. Anyway, here's some pictures.

This is when it first arrived. Abe inspected the shipment, as he always does.


He's not too sure what to think of it...


We would hold treats out just a few feet in front of him so that he had to take a couple steps to get to them. When we first put him in it, you could tell that he thought he needed to be very still, so the treats definitely helped him to learn the concept of moving while in the cart.


I have a million captions for this photo, most of which revolve around remedial class, but I'll let you make your own:


Okay, so my intelligence level is also doubtful at times...

Yard Stuff

Just because I like flowers.

Post about N turned to randomly missing Kona...

We talked with N and his mom tonight. We e-mail and talk on the phone here and there, but it had been a while since the last time, so it was nice to get an update this evening on how they are. Sounds like they are still doing great out there. His mom sounds so much happier and less stressed. It makes me so happy for N. It's funny how you can see kids developing even when you aren't in person. Even just by hearing him on the phone, I could tell he is getting older (and I'm not talking about voice change - I'm talking about things like reasoning/thinking skills, communication skills, stuff like that.) He sounded so much more mature, and it's been less than a year since they moved! I can't imagine how he will grow and change in the next few years. He is such a bright kid, so much potential. I hope life hands him opportunities to make good on it.

Otherwise, summer is in full swing here. Lawn mowers humming, air conditioners clicking on and off, bug bites all over my legs...I love it! I don't know if Jesse and I will ever find a way to reckon our climate differences. He would be content with mountains and snow for most of the year, and I would much prefer to drip sweat and feel lethargic while eating a popsicle. I keep telling him, the big island is the only place in the world with all climate zones. =) I remember going up Mauna Kea when I lived there, and starting out in shorts and a tank top, then slowly layering up as we got higher. By the end, we were wrapped in sleeping bags, standing on snow, and watching the sunset from above the clouds. Kona was the one place that I actually liked to camp. We used to go on the weekends a lot. They have laws that no one can own beach property, so technically any beach on the island is public property, which is really awesome when you want to camp or swim. I miss all the stuff to do there, and an active lifestyle in general. Even though I was there for almost a year, I only knew Jesse for about 3 weeks of that time, so we never really got to take advantage of the hiking and camping stuff together. In fact, I don't think we even went to the beach together. The first time we got together, we were going to go snorkeling, but it was kind of a cloudy day, so we ended up going to Borders instead. And then after that, one of us was either in class or on work duty, so we would usually just walk to the sea wall in the evenings and watch the waves. Usually with a blizzard or shaved ice in hand. =) Anyway, I am determined to someday go back there with him so that we can actually see the island together. Maybe on our 10 year anniversary.... only 3 1/2 years away. Hmmm..this makes me want to go find my photo album from then, but I just realized, I think it's at my mom's house in my old bedroom closet. I have been meaning/needing to get up there and clean it out so that she doesn't have all my junk, but haven't gotten that far yet. I should do that soon...and if I find any fun pictures from back then, I will post them. I wish I had them now!

Grandpa Abe

We have decided to get Abe a wheelchair, or "cart" as they are called. (Don't laugh!) His back legs are getting worse and we don't get to walk very far now when we take him and Horton. However, we don't want to stop taking him, because I think the activity is helping him stay healthy. When we first got him, he had spent a couple months in the pound, and his joints were so bad. He would pop and creak every time he moved. After a few weeks of walks though, and being able to move around in the house with us instead of being in the little pen at the pound, it was like he aged backward. His joints had a better range of motion and he had more energy, so we want to keep him active as much as possible. Granted, it's a very slow activity at his age, but activity none the less. Anyway, we used to joke that one day he would need a wheelchair, but the joke has become reality now. Doggie wheelchairs are quite expensive because they are custom made to the measurements of the dog. Instead of buying new, we found a used cart that fit Abe's measurements which brought the price down into a more reasonable range for our budget. We were really lucky to find a used one that fits his numbers. It is being shipped to us, so it's not here yet, but I'll be sure and post some pics of Abe in his cart after we get it. When in the cart, he will still be able to use his back legs, but the pressure of his weight won't be riding on his hips anymore.

Here is an example of a dog using one:

Photo from eddieswheels.com

There's the harness up by the neck and then it's like a figure 8 piece where the legs go into the cart.

As we are finding out, there is quite a market for pet carts. They even have cross country ski attachments, front leg carts, counterbalanced carts, pretty much everything! We don't plan for Abe to use his cart around the house, just when we take him out on walks or down to the dog park. I hope he adjusts to it well. From stories we've read, most dogs love them once they realize that when they are in them they can run and walk again. They can even swim in them, though Abe hates the water, so I doubt he'll be taking advantage of that feature! I just hope he takes to it well.

I know it seems so silly (and maybe even ridiculous and out of whack) to some people, but to us, it just seems like the right thing to do. I know he's "just a dog", but I know he would fight to the death to protect me and make sure I am safe. Knowing his loyal heart, I can't help but want to be loyal to him too. He has brought a lot of good into our lives. We are pretty sure he and Horton have helped prevent our house from being broken into, and when Jesse has been working nights or early mornings and I'm sleeping at home alone, I feel so much comfort when I hear Abe snoozing on the floor next to the bed. And he makes me laugh almost every day with his personality. Some people say dogs don't have emotions, but I don't think those people have ever lived with dogs. So to me, Abe is part of the family and if I can make his life better and longer by giving him a little boost when he needs it, then I will.

Plants and Stuff

Today, I planted some petunias, 2 honeysuckle vines, and a wisteria vine. I have been waiting all season for the honeysuckle to be in stock, and today, I finally found some! I was very excited, and then even more excited when I saw wisteria next to the honeysuckle because I had been searching all over for wisteria earlier this season and had given up. In any case, the honeysuckle plants are for the front pergola and the wisteria is for the back pergola. I also have about six or seven tomato plants that my Grandma gave me yesterday at the panty party. I was planning to get them in today, but ran out of steam after digging the holes for the other plants. Probably better, because I need to do some rearranging in my beds to make space for them anyway. Hopefully I will get to that sometime this week.


My lettuce and spinach bed...with another type of "head" being silly.

Picking some strawberries.
There are lots of strawberries, but they are relatively small. I wonder if they will get bigger as my plants get more mature? Jesse is the strawberry guard. The birds have discovered the plants and have been snacking on it, so when Jesse sees them, he goes running toward the bed, yelling "caw caw". It's really funny.
This is the wisteria I put in today (and Horton trying to get Jesse's attention). Check out how big it is already!! I am hoping that by late summer, the pergola is at least half covered so we can get some shade on the deck.
A couple days ago, I finally started painting all of the furniture that we got a few weeks back. It was a pain in the butt to paint because there were so many boards, and so many angles. I got both chairs, the table, 80% of the lounger, and a tiny bit of the bench done and then started whining about how sore my back was, so Jesse jumped in and painted the rest. (I am sure his back was just as sore though, because he was working on other projects while I was painting!) Anyway, this is the lounger. I say not too shabby at all for free furniture! (Well, almost free..we did buy the paint and new cushions.)

And last but not least, all my boys hanging out.

Panty Party

Today was the bridal shower for my almost sister-in-law. The theme was "panty party" and all in all, I think it turned out pretty well. There ended up being somewhere between 15 and 20 people. I've never had that many people in my house at once, and shockingly, we all fit! It was so nice to have my mom and step-mom helping. I think I would have felt a little lost without them! I realized I've never hosted any event besides small dinner gatherings for friends and family, but that is usually 6 people tops. I really like the idea of entertaining, but this morning, I did have a brief moment of panic when I realized that not only had I never hosted this many people, but also, most of the people that would be coming were complete strangers to me (her family, friends, etc). So having my mom and step-mom here was a really nice way to ease my way into things and not feel totally freaked. And having Jesse's support was great too, because not only did he help me clean the house and get the backyard all cleaned up nice, he also took Horton and Abe away for the day so that I didn't have to worry about dogs trying to eat people's cake or generally rubbing up against people who don't love dogs as much as I do. So thank you Jesse!!


I made another fondant cake. I wish I had more special events to make cakes for, because I really like playing with dough. My piping didn't turn out as nice as I had hoped, but I will keep practicing!


We decorated in pink and white. Pink is my sis-in-law's favorite color.


One of many funny gifts...

Nothing in Particular

I cashed in some of my points from our debit card reward system, and got an itunes gift card. Today, I downloaded In the Name of Love: Africa Celebrates U2. I now have "monkey monkey me say, monkey monkey me say, why you kissin' my pole" stuck in my head (though I am quite sure that is not what they are saying...it's Swahili maybe? I don't know. Some parts are English, some are French, and I'm not sure about this other language.)

I only have one week until summer classes start. Not ready for that. At all. I'm debating about dropping a class or two. I'm nearing burn out stage, which means I probably need to take a break, but also means I want to push even harder to just get it done. Not that I don't enjoy it. For the most part, I do, but my brain is completely ADD when it comes to art. I get really into some medium, go insane with it, and then get bored, toss it aside, and want something new. Right now it's sugar art. And talking to me right now, I would say I love it and could do it forever. But, it's like those junior high girls. But, with him it's different. I mean, I've never felt this way about any other guy before, and then three months later they are saying the same thing about another guy...except insert acrylics, printmaking, or any other type of art for "guy". Oh well. For the time being at least, I am basking in the world of sugar art and planning to marry it.

Next weekend, I am having a bridal shower for my soon to be sister-in-law. I'm hoping the weather is nice enough that we can be outside since our house is tiny. I still need to get her a gift. It's a "panty party", so maybe I can find some cute pajamas or something. Speaking of, every time I go into the lingerie section, I am baffled by 18 hour bras. I have never understood the concept. When I was a kid, I would see commercials for them, and I always thought it must be like Cinderella...when the clock strikes and those 18 hours are over, poof - saggy. Needless to say, I'll never buy one of those...

Other than the bridal shower, it's just work this week. OH WAIT! I forgot, Jesse and I have couples massage on Wednesday. I'm so excited. Remember how I told you my boss said he was giving me a bonus, well he gave me a much bigger than expected bonus in the form of gift cards to this nice spa, as well as Lowe's. (He knows me well!) Anyway, so Jesse and I are getting massages and with the Lowe's, we decided to get some new light fixtures. My boss would be very happy with that, as he insists that lighting is "the jewelry of the home". We've been really blessed with these "extras" popping up here and there that have allowed us to make upgrades to the house or just go out and have a relaxing time together.

Which actually, we have a slight crunch in the vacation plans. Our "Bush bucks" were less than expected. Figures...should have read the fine print before assuming we'd get the full amount! It was either $1200 (which would cover vacation and leave us some spending money for while we are there) or our "tax liability", whichever is less...and we got the less. =) So, we will need to decide if we should change the vacation plans, delay them, or if we can save up enough to cover the shortage. We have talked about it, but so far the only conversation has been "Hm. We should decide that." I imagine we will either find a way to come up with the money, or just push back the dates to give us some time to save up. Either way though, I'm still holding out to see Mickey at some point this year.

All in all, that's about it...

The End

I talked with an old friend from Mercy Ships today. Haven't talked with him since our last day there. It's so timely, because last week, I was really thinking through our time there again and just trying to get some sense of closure or some sense of clarity about what exactly happened and what exactly I feel about it all. So, today was a nice test of sorts when the opportunity to chat with him came up randomly. I got to say some things I needed to say, and it ended up being really good. I've come to realize, the only thing I actually regret about our time there was not having the strength to stand up for myself, or not having someone in my life who would stand up for me when I needed it so desperately. I was so young (not that I'm terribly old and wise now), but I really didn't know any better during that time in my life. I took what was piled on me, and I trusted that when the weight was too much to bear, it was my fault, not anyone else's. Now I know better. And all the stuff that happened that hurt not just me, but others in a really deep way, wasn't anyone's fault in particular. There are things that I could have and should have done differently, and things others could have and should have done differently. It's a shame that it all went down the way that it did, but it's not beyond repair, which is maybe what I had confirmed today. And somehow, more than five years later, I finally feel free about the whole ordeal. I really didn't think I would ever have that. It's weird. It's like part of my future is opened up again. I don't quite know how to explain it. I know this whole paragraph is probably odd to most, as neither Jesse or I have shared with anyone the full on details of everything that happened during our time with Mercy Ships, but for those who saw us walk through it in any capacity, I think you know that it killed something in each of us and very radically altered our entire life path. In a sense, it defined so much of us as individuals and as a couple. So, to have any piece of whatever might have been lost during that time back, is very sweet and I find myself having trouble putting words to it...the only way I know how to explain the feeling is by imagining that you had lost something that you loved so dearly - a child, a person - and had made as much peace with never seeing it again as you could, only to have it show up again one day. The return is sweeter than honey from the comb. So this, my friends, is finally how the Mercy Ships story ends.

Backyard Stuff

The pergola is all stained now and I am very happy with how it turned out. I still need to plant some wisteria to grow up it, but it is pretty much done besides cleaning up.

The lettuce is coming in very nicely. The spinach is coming in, but much slower and smaller (see back row in the photo). I am so anxious to have my first garden salad of the summer.
This is my herb bed. The chives are getting ready to bloom, and the oregano is looking really good. The lemon balm is causing me a bit of trouble. It's growing...but a bit too well. It has reseeded itself and if I don't stop it, the entire bed will be full of it within two years. See all the little green sprouts on the bed...that's all new starts of lemon balm. Not sure what I am going to do about that yet. It is a pretty plant, it smells nice, I can use it in tea and recipes, and it makes nice accents in bouquets, so I suppose having a lot wouldn't be so terrible, but I want space for my other herbs. I put in lavender this year and still need to add my basil.
Mmmm....those flowers will be strawberries in just a few weeks....

Day 2 Without Electricity

I like electricity. A lot. You never realize how much you count on it until it's gone. I'm using the little generator thingie again to blog, but odds are, it won't last too much longer. I really thought we'd have full power back by now. Oh well. Last night, I went to First Fridays with a friend. (First Fridays is each first Friday of the month, where all the galleries in the area stay open and let people browse through and what not.) On my way home, I went by the grocery store to get milk and a bag of ice. Jesse and I can do without most foods, with the exception of Frosted Mini Spooners. If we don't have those in the morning, the whole day is bad. So, milk was a must. Though, when I got up this morning to have mine, 90% of the milk bottle had leaked into the freezer. Hm. Anyway, driving onto the street last night was creepy. It was so dark. I'm so used to the street lights. I showered by candlelight, (though it definitely was not as romantic as many body wash commercials may portray it to be.) On the bright side, because all of our food is spoiled, and there is now milk all over the freezer, the fridge will get a really good spring cleaning! I am not sure what to do with myself the last day or so. Yesterday, both work and school were cancelled for me due to the storm. (My boss was flying in, but got diverted, so he wasn't around yesterday), and then there was no power at the university, so they cancelled all classes. I was supposed to work today, but my boss just called and cancelled again because obviously it's been crazy for them with his flights getting messed up, and since they also live in the storm path, they've got a huge mess to clean up outside also. Soooo....here I sit...hoping to see a man climb up the power pole soon.

Nikkel Adventures: Tornadoes and Mouse Revenge!

I am blogging with the help of a generator that Jesse has for outdoor photo shoots. Otherwise, we have no electricity in the house. Last night we had some major storms. We are really thankful that our house is still fully in tact, because just a few blocks north and to the west of us, there are houses that got completely torn to shreds. Most had the roofs and/or 2nd story torn off, but one house actually came completely off its foundation. We seriously missed it by less than a half mile. Thankfully, I don't think there were any deaths, just a ton of property damage. Our house didn't get any major damage...we do have a downed power line in our backyard, our swing blew over and got torn up a bit, and our neighbor's tree is down in on our front yard, but all things considered, that is pretty stinking good! Not sure when we will have electricity again. When Jesse called the power company, they said there are about 40,000 houses without power and they could not give an estimate of when things would be fixed, so looks like we may be in a long line for the time being! Anyway, so that was last night's adventure. Not much sleep happening around here!

Our other recent adventure, well, actually this was more Jesse's adventure at which I laughed and took photos while feeling terribly sorry for him. He went down into the crawl space to check out some wiring down there and things were all well and good....until I suddenly heard yelling, looked over at the hole in the ground, and saw Jesse fly up out of it in a single bound. (Trust me, no small feat.) He had seen something dead in the corner, which we instantly knew was a mouse. Jesse isn't a fan of mice or snakes, so I offered to go down and be the one to get it, but he insisted that he would take care of it. So, he began suiting up. He put on his work coveralls, then began duct taping every place where anything could get in his clothes and crawl up him. I was trying my best to hold back laughter, but didn't do a very good job. After getting all duct taped up, he put on his respirator and grabbed a shovel (to pick it up with) and a bucket (to put it in) and then quickly informed me that we would be buying a new bucket and disposing of this one. A few minutes later, and he emerged triumphant. I was very proud of him because this is seriously one of his biggest fears come to life and he handled it so well! Anyway, this, we figured, was the mouse's revenge from our escapades a couple months ago. We went through the house and there were no new signs of them being inside here, so we figured maybe the one that had taken up residence under our dishwasher decided to move into the crawl space after Jesse scared the crap of it by trying to shop vac it up when he saw it. Jesse made yet another trip to Lowe's to buy poison and spread a bunch more in the crawl space. He thinks they were getting in near a hole where the air conditioning unit stuff runs into the house, so he also put screen and boards over any little crevice he could find. Hopefully this is the last of our rodent ordeals.

Check out the man in action!!