We're Back!

We are back from vacation and we are very tired! We caught an early flight out of Orlando, so we had to get up at 4:50 (3:50 Missouri time) in the morning. Not fun! But, at least we made all of our flights! We had a really good time, although it was jam packed. Here are a few photos...

This is Jesse at our resort the evening we arrived. The resort was very pretty, although we were so busy doing other things, that we hardly spent any time there!





Disney World is made up of 6 parks, lots of cool resorts, "Downtown Disney" (a shopping/dining/entertainment area), as well as a few other things like golf courses and the wide worlds of sports. We only had time make it to four of the parks. The 2 we didn't go to are water parks.

We started off at Animal Kingdom, which is my favorite of their parks. As always at Disney, the theming and attention to detail are amazing. This is Jesse in "Asia".


Here I am being an "honorary bug". (The glasses are for a 3d show.) Jesse and I went to this show last time we were at Animal Kingdom and still love it. The special effects go beyond just a 3d movie screen to smells that they pump into the theater, air that blast through, and mechanics in the seats that make you feel different effects.



This is the "safari". Disney rides are different from other amusement park rides, because they always tell a story, and the rider is always involved. So, for example, on this ride, we were on a 2 week safari in Africa, and end up helping the wildlife reserve save 2 elephants from poachers. Jesse and I really like this ride, because you get to see so many different animals, and you can't see a cage or fence in sight.

Animal Kingdom has a ton of beautiful scenery. I could just walk around the area all day even if there were no animals!



Besides seeing a ton of animals, we also rode a fun dinosaur ride, and I tried out their newest thrill ride, Expedition Everest. Jesse wasn't feeling really great, so he stayed back and waited for me. I think he may have been the smart one! I've never been quite so surprised or freaked on a ride before in my life!

After we were done at the park, we went to eat at a restaurant at one of the other Disney resorts, called the Animal Kingdom Lodge. This is Jesse getting ready to enjoy his dessert plate!



This is us just walking around the resort grounds and seeing more animals.


We were on Disney's dining plan, which was awesome. You get 2 snacks, 2 counter service meals, and 2 sit down meals for each night of your stay. You get to choose where to redeem the meals at, so there is a wide variety. And the meals include drinks, appetizers, main dish, and desserts, so you get a lot of good food. Plus, the meal plan already includes tips, so you don't even have to worry about that. Having the meal plan let us eat at places that we could otherwise never afford. For example, our first night there, the meal we ate was 80 bucks!

Day two we went to MGM Studios in the morning and Epcot for the afternoon and evening.

At MGM, we only went on one ride. We decided we weren't brave enough for the others (like tower of terror). The coolest thing we did there (in my opinion at least) was the "Lights, Camera, Action, Extreme Stunt Show". Basically, cars speeding around, things catching on fire, and stuff like that. But they roll back the clips and then explain how they do different stunts and such in movies, so it was pretty interesting.

This is a photo of us before the show, with the "movie set" in the background.



And this is Jesse singing in the rain!



As we were leaving MGM, it started to pour rain. Thankfully, we had checked the weather before and bought ponchos to bring with us, so we busted those out right as we arrived at Epcot.

Jesse sporting his fashionable poncho...


A big part of Epcot is the world showcase, where they have all these little lands set up to be like countries. We decided to have dinner in Morocco at Marrakesh. We got to enjoy a little belly dancing while we ate! (Sorry for the bad photo....Jesse is much better than me!)


This is Jesse in line for one of his favorite Disney rides, Test Track. The idea is that you are testing new cars, so you go through all the crash test dummy experiments. The ride ends with the "barrier test" and you go speeding out the building around a track. It's a fun ride.


And, here's us in front of the Epcot ball.


Epcot also had a ride called Soarin, which we love. The idea is that you are hang gliding over California. It's basically a big IMAX screen, but you sit in seats that go up and dangle you in front of the screen, then they pump in air to simulate the wind, and as you go over different scenes, they pump in smells (like pine trees as you fly over a forest). My favorite part of the ride was when we crested over a cliff, and Jesse taught all the little children on the ride a new phrase spelled O-H S-H-I-T. (Jesse's not a big fan of heights.)

Anyway, our last day there we went to the Magic Kingdom, which is the park that most people think of when they think Disney. It has Cinderella's castle and most of the Disney classics like It's a Small World and Pirates of the Caribbean.

I made Jesse try on some silly hats and pose for photos.







This is in front of the tea cups.


And of course, who can go to Disney and not see the castle?

Great Minds Think Alike....Or not??

I knew Jesse and I were similar, but I laughed when I saw how my results compared to his results.

My worldview is shattered...

I have been meaning to blog this very disturbing news for a while now. It is finally time. Here's the story...

A while ago, we were chatting with N about his favorite shows, which include Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. This just happens to be a show that I loved as a kid. In fact, as weird as it is, I had a crush on Michelangelo (orange belt, nunchucks). Anyway, so the conversation is trotting along fine, when I mention Shredder, the ultimate villain. Suddenly, it screeches to a halt, because THEY KILLED SHREDDER! I was shocked. Shocked. Anyway, needless to say, the TMNT that I once knew and loved is no more. How can the show even exist without Shredder, the main nemesis? It's sick really, sick.

Quick Update

I am in day two of my Fall I semester. (Mi suegra sería feliz de saber que yo me matriculé en español.) I'm comtemplating a double major, but I will give it a few weeks and see...I was pretty excited about graduating a year from this Christmas, but if I do the double major deal, I'm going to be adding a lot of time. Ugh. Jesse starts his semester tomorrow and I can't even keep track of what all he enrolled in. All I know is he has a full load.

We leave for vacation a week from tomorrow and I am getting excited. I will try to post some video clips when we get back. Jesse makes great vacation videos.

Anyway, have to run for now. I need to help Jesse find a binder.

Lessons Learned

After living with Jesse for 5 1/2 years, this is what I have learned:

He thinks half cooked potatoes are the most disgusting food in the world. He will only turn in one direction when he sleeps. He likes the toilet paper hung in a such a fashion that it drapes over the front, and not behind the back. If you ask him a question and he doesn't know the answer, he will tell you an answer anyway. If you ever say "You're right", he will immediately respond with "I'm sorry, what was that you said?". He can do math in his head faster than anyone I know and he can fix anything that goes wrong in a house. If he says he will cook dinner, you can assume you are having a)chili or b)pasta, unless it's summer, in which case you are having a)grilled potatoes or b)grilled fajitas. He refuses to say "bruschetta" the way most of North America says it, and insists on saying it with the real Italian pronounciation. He prefers Coke to Pepsi. He has excellent teaching skills and he likes to listen to NPR (Canadian translation=CBC Radio).

3.....2.....1....

Official countdown to vacation: 11 days

Official countdown to fall semester: 1 day

Official countdown to freaking out over everything that needs to be done before vacation: 3 days

Jesse the Role Model

Last night, we had N. We were chatting with his mom out by our car, when N came running toward the car, then stopped and mumbled he forgot something, and turned around to run into the house to get it. What he had forgotten was his hat. He doesn't normally wear hats when we are with him, but his mom told us that he wants to start wearing a hat so he can be like Jesse. (Ever since I worked at Zephyr and got free hats, Jesse now wears them all the time.) Anyway, she also told us that he has to get glasses, but he is excited about it because now he will really look like Jesse with a hat and glasses.

Another busy week

We took N to "Worlds of Fun" Thursday. It's an amusement park around here. I've never been to a Six Flags, but from what I know, it's not quite as big as that, but it's definitely bigger than Calaway Park or a place like that. Anyway, we were thinking it was our big splurge for the summer with N, since he goes back to school soon. Turns out, he is afraid of about 90% of the rides there. I actually felt quite bad for him, because his fear was very real and very apparent on a couple of the rides that we actually did go on. It's hard to see a kid, especially one that you have come to really care about, be filled with such anxiety. However, despite not riding many things and a few moments of panic for N, the day did end up being fun, and I really enjoyed getting to know N a bit more. It has been a really good summer with him and with our relationship with his mom. I hope it continues on this path. We are approaching our one year match anniversary (coming up in September). Seems like it has gone fast. Has definitely been a roller coaster. It's weird, because I mean, BBBS asks that you make a one year commitment at minimum...but after a year, it's not like you can just be like "okay, commitment done". I mean, you're involved. It's a relationship and you don't just sever that and toss it away, ya know? We definitely plan to keep seeing N, although I admit it will be tricky this fall as Jesse starts in with classes and the schedule starts to book up.

Anyway, yesterday Jesse worked a double, and I ran errands and tried to get stuff around here done...the mountain of laundry, paying bills, garden stuff... Oh, and I actually went to the gym all by myself...whoo hoo...I'm slowly getting over that whole intimidation thing.

Today, after Jesse got home from work and napped, we went over to my brother's to help him put in new floors. He got the click together hardwood stuff. It will look nice when they are all done, but it's debatable if the click together is any easier than real hardwoods. I mean, no nailing is a definite plus, but the bad side of no nailing is that the floors free float, and as such, move...pretty easily actually, which can be a bugger when you don't want the floor to shift! Anyway, tomorrow I think I might spend some time on our house and possibly start on the bedroom. Today, I think I finally got the plan to come together in my mind, and now I'm excited to get it done. Although we haven't done the kitchen cabinets yet, but I'm feeling too lazy to start in on that one tomorrow.

That is about it for now...I'm mainly just blogging to unwind and don't have anything in particular to say. OH! But before I go, here a couple photos of some garden stuff...(I know, I know, just humor me and look.)



Yesterday, I picked all of these tomatoes. (I took the photo to show Jesse how many we got.) Then, I spent a good hour or two with the food processor making salsa, basil/tomato mix thingie, and tomato sauce. I lost count of how many bags I froze, but I think it's safe to say that we will be able to eat tomato products all winter long. Yum.

And this...our first watermelon! Jesse likes to call this variety "personal size". They are small enough that we can eat a whole melon in one sitting. Last week, Jesse was dropping some roll kuchen hints. I have no idea how to spell roll "coo-kin" by the way.

Anyway, that's it for now!

Serious and Not Serious Stuff

Well, finals are over and I got all of my homework and what not finished up this morning. I am very glad to be done...that is one big stress off, although I still feel a bit "off". I've just been struggling so much lately with purpose and direction. I'm really questioning psychology and art seems to haunt me. A few weeks ago, I had a dream that I went back to KCAI and I was looking for something that I had lost there. I don't think that all dreams mean something, but I do think that sometimes we can "dream out" our feelings, even if we don't necessarily know we have them. Regardless, I woke up feeling very sad from that dream and that seems to have been the starts of my entire search for what in the world I am doing, and if I want grad school or not, and if I'm even in the right major and this and that and blah blah blah, and I am still stuck in all of that blah blah blah. I just wonder if I will ever find the right fit. And this fall, with Jesse going back to school too, I just feel like something will be changing, but I don't know what that is.

Oh well...I'll wait and see I guess.

In the less serious world, I officially decided to go vegetarian. Technically, I am a lacto-ovo-vegetarian, meaning I still eat eggs and dairy. I have been doing it for quite a few weeks now, and surprisingly, I really don't miss meat. Most people I've told immediately ask me "Why?!", with a scrunched up "Are you nuts!?" face on, or they say "Where will you get protein!?" in a somewhat accusing and panicked tone. You would think I had just told them that I am giving up water or something life sustaining. Anyway, so for clarification in the blog world, I will answer these questions. Before I go into why though, let me say that I don't think it's wrong to eat meat, as many people seem to assume that I hold that belief just because I choose not to. I don't think that at all. I decided to do it for a combo of reasons that all added up to enough to make me personally want to stop eating meat, and that is really the extent of it. Some reasons are smaller, some reasons are bigger. For one, I've never been a big meat eater in the first place. Two, there are numerous and substantial health benefits to eating a mostly plant based diet. Three, plant products are environmentally friendly compared to meat products. Four, I very much disagree with factory farm practices, and factory farms supply a very large portion of the meat that I would be eating (restaurants, the majority of meat in grocery stores, etc). Those are the main four reasons probably, with some weighing a lot heavier than others. Anyway, so that is that. I have actually been really enjoying trying new foods. And as far as where I get protein....nuts, whole grains (which I consume mass quantities of), eggs, milk, soy, beans, cheese...all decent to excellent sources of protein that I eat up.

Anyway, speaking of health and diets...Jesse and I went back to the gym today. After our initial consultation deal, they took our info and created a program for us, so today we went around with one of the trainers and learned our programs and how to use some different machines and how to have the proper form and where our heart rate should be and how to breathe and stuff like that. It was actually really fun. Granted, I still had my initial intimidation "I want to get out of here" feeling as soon as I walked in and looked around, but once we got going, I really forgot that there were even other people there. Plus, Jesse and I were given the same program. I guess because we had similar goals of what we wanted. Obviously, his involves heavier weights and stuff than mine does, but we do all the same exercises (minus one), so we go around on the stuff together. It really helps having a partner, so I don't feel so stupid when I forget how to adjust a machine or when I am breathing like an asthmatic bull. I am actually looking forward to going back. Hopefully it stays this way! Jesse was kind enough to buy me a "work-out outfit" complete with new gym shoes so that I didn't have to keep wearing my grass stained shoes that I mow the lawn in when we go. Now once I tone up a little, maybe I will actually look like I belong when we go to the gym!

Anyway, around here, we are pondering when to start in on the kitchen cabinets. We are going to paint them, and although that's pretty minor, it does mean we will need to tape everything off, sand them down, prime them...which will take some time. We thought about doing it this weekend, but time is already getting away from us, so maybe next weekend instead. We are painting them a creamy white color.

After that is done, I'd like to redo the bedroom, but that will be minimal as well. When we first moved in, I loved that room because it's on the east side of the house, and in the morning, the sun would gradually creep in and fill the room with light. We ended up putting up window shades as well as other material over the windows and they pretty much never get opened now, so the room is constantly dark. It's nice for sleeping in and for when Jesse takes naps, but it is also kind of just dim and uninviting and I feel like our bedroom always get the raw end of the deal when it comes to decorating. When we moved in to this house, I told Jesse that I would really like to put some time and effort into having a nice bedroom. Originally, with the sun coming in, I thought it would be nice to do a Kona type theme in there (not like crazy tropical Hawaiian shirt prints or anything, but a subdued ocean type theme). Anyway, we deviated from that idea and ended up going with browns and some reds (I was rebelling against the blue living room walls and didn't want blue anywhere else in the house at the time.) But, now that the living room walls have been brown for some time, I think I could handle some blues and cooler colors in the bedroom and I really do miss that sunshine that used to pour in through the window. So, I am thinking of reverting back to the original ideas for the bedroom. It actually should be a fairly simple, cheap, and easy redo. Any paint that I would need, I could mix from colors we already have, and beyond that, it would just be a couple yards of material and few man hours. Oh, and maybe a plant.

Anyway, I should be done with the blogging. I have been trying to get to bed at a decently early time to help make it easier for Jesse to get to bed early because of his insane morning work hours. Although I will definitely never make it onto the exact same weirdo schedule he has, I am trying to at least somewhat align, and as such, it's technically past my new bedtime.

A Depressing Week

Please excuse me while I have a whiny pity party.

I have finals tomorrow and haven't really studied at all. It has been insanely crazy around here the last few days and after exhausting myself trying to study any extra second that I have, I am finally giving up, and letting the chips fall where they may. I should have done that three days ago.

N's mom's car broke down. Radiator leaks all over. Jesse went out and replaced the radiator for her, but she just called and is broken down on the side of the road again, so he is off to get her and see if he can figure out what went wrong. I think there is still a leak somewhere. Hopefully it will be something as simple as tightening a hose or something, but I hope he is able to figure it out without too much time or stress. I feel awful for N's mom, as it's the only car she has, and she has been having a neighbor take her to work this week. This week both of the boys are away at camp, so at least she isn't having to find ways to shuttle them around this week. I think they come back tomorrow or Saturday, so hopefully Jesse can have the car fixed by then....and hopefully it doesn't cost any more money to buy new parts and what not. (Jesse was concerned that her battery was also going when he replaced the radiator.) You can pray for Mr. Mechanic Jesse to figure out what's wrong and be able to fix it quickly, and especially for N's mom, with everything that she has on her plate.

Jesse and I joined a gym. We had our initial consultation thingie where they do your body fat analysis and weight and talk about your goals and work on setting up a plan for you and what not. I am officially the heaviest I have ever been and feel disgusting. Gyms are totally intimidating to me and it took all of my courage just to walk in and let someone who probably works out every day pinch fat all over my body and publicly record the findings. Really, they should hire fat people to do that part, so you don't feel quite so bad about yourself. =)

My tomato blossoms are not setting fruit lately and I cannot figure out why.

I don't like Jesse's dumb work schedule. I feel awful that he works so hard and has such bad hours. I worry over his health and if this job is hurting it. Plus, with him leaving the house practically in the middle of the night, I hardly sleep after his alarm goes off and he leaves, and it has really caught up with me this week in feeling really tired and sleepy and stressed out.

Abe is getting old and I am worried about him. His back legs are starting to give out on him more and more lately and he's pooed in the house twice this week. (One, I almost grabbed with my bare hands, as I had just woken up, and groggily wondered "What's the brown thing on the floor?"...Thankfully, I registered what it was about two seconds before picking it up.) He doesn't seem to be in any pain, and I am so thankful for that, but I fear for the future and worry that we will have to make tough decisions over various doggie surgeries or remedies, none of which we could probably afford. Horton and Abe are such a part of the family to me, and I just want to do everything that I can to protect them and make sure that they are happy and healthy. I can't imagine being a mom - the love must drive you insane, as I go this crazy over my dogs, let alone a human.

Anyway, life is not so bad...just this week feels like I'm a shirt that's being wrung through one of those old-fashioned washing boards. Next week will be better I have no doubt...or so I tell myself. =) Pity party done.

Our "boys" and us

Although we have been happy with our swing, I think Horton likes it the most. He gets pretty excited when he sees one of us walking toward it.

And no matter how much extra space there is on the swing, he just has to sit right up against you to get in some snuggle time.

I'm picking some cherry tomatoes.

Horton taste tests them, but he isn't too sure what to think. His discriminating taste buds much prefer the ketchup.

Abe likes the snuggles too, but his hips have a hard time getting onto the swing, so he usually prefers the grass.

Mmmmm....this photo was taken about 1 second after I got a big delicious Abe kiss.

Summer

Remember being a kid when two weeks seemed like forever, and summer time went on and on? What happened to that? It's mid-July already! Spring just started, let alone summer. Anyway, here's what we're up to lately...

Horton and Abe inspect the work of art that Abe created on the patio...(why again, are dogs so loveable??)

Jesse got a free frisbee at his college orientation. We tried to get Horton to play with it, but when you throw the frisbee at him, he squints his eyes, ducks his head and runs away.
Still no luck with the frisbee thing...
Jesse is redoing the laundry room and back part of the garage to make better use of the space.

I am anxiously awaiting red tomatoes (and bell peppers and cucumbers and watermelon).

On the Lighter Side...

Yesterday after I got off work, we headed up to my Grandpa's house to celebrate his 86th birthday and the 4th of July. We played with fireworks, and watching the entire scene, it's quite amazing that no one ended up going to the ER. When we got home, we lit one fountain that we had saved, and Abe defended us against all the other fireworks. Poor dog....it was one thing for him to hear the sounds, but I let him come out back with me, and when he caught a glimpse of the city's fireworks in the sky, I've never seen his eyes get so big. My heart melted for him though, because you could tell the poor dog was terrified, yet he'd run and bark at the sky in an effort to protect us anyway. Even this morning when we let him out, the first thing he did was look up where the fireworks had been and bark. Abe is the most loyal dog I have ever known and he holds such a deep place in my heart. A couple months ago, I was home alone at night, and all of a sudden, there was this loud banging on the door. Not just a knock, but a very forceful banging. Anyway, it kind of freaked me out, and as I stepped toward the door to look out the peep hole, Abe got in front of me, laid down against the door, and bared all of his weight up against it. He is just so fiercely loyal to his pack.

In any case, today we had N. We took him to "Science City" for the day, which is just a big place with all kinds of kid exhibits and interactive stuff. Wore me out. After we got home, I spent a good amount of time in the garden pruning back the jungle of tomatoes. I cut so much off. My grandma told me that you can only put about 4 plants to a bed, and I should have heeded her advice. I put 6 in one bed (due to lack of space elsewhere) and it's so thick and dense now. I have been worried that if I don't prune some, it will just invite a fungus or disease in because it's so moist and dark down toward the bottom. Anyway, upon doing this, I finally realized where the term "green thumb" comes from. After I got in and started washing, the water literally ran neon green and the tips of my fingers were stained a brownish-green color. I never knew "green thumb" was literal...I don't know where I thought it came from. The good news is that there are lots of green tomatoes on the vines though. We also now have strawberry plants growing (at Jesse's request). I'm pinching off all the blossoms this year, so we won't get any fruit for the summer, but next summer hopefully we will have some nice juicy berries. I think I decided we need a plot of land in the country where I can have an acre for gardens. There are so many things I want to grow, but just don't have the space...without taking up the whole backyard at least. I planted some wildflowers in between my watermelon and cucumbers, but right now, it just looks like a row of weeds. I hope something blossoms soon... OH! And this will not be exciting to anyone other than garden-freaks like me, but my compost pile was smoking hot a week or so ago. I need a compost thermometer to give me proper bragging rights...add it to the list of garden wishes. =) This is another reason we need a place in the country, I want another compost pile. Since I keep adding to this one, it never really gets "done". I need two piles, so I can be adding to one while the other finishes off. Ahhh..someday.

Otherwise, Jesse has orientation at school this coming week and I am buried under term papers and approaching finals. I plan to spend most of my weekend inside working on papers. It's so much harder in the summer when the sun is shining and it's all hot outside though. Oh well, someday I will be done writing papers...and for now, I should probably be done writing blog posts too...

PhD's and stuff part II

I have been pouring over the options upon graduation over the last few days and my head has been spinning because of it. I've been doing a lot of research and trying to narrow in on what I want. I think at this point I have ruled out the PhD in neuroscience and the PhD in clinical psychology. I think the schooling part of it would be amazingly fun and interesting, and I think I'd really love studying both, but for jobs, those two degrees really lead to 2 main things: teaching or research. I don't want to be a professor, and research could be interesting, but it brings up a lot of ethical issues for me. So much of medical research is done with animals, and I have an extremely difficult time deciding over whether I think the end results justify the means. While not all research involves animals, there is a good chance that I'd be faced with that dilemma more than a few times in a research career. I don't want to deal with it, and I don't want to have to come to a conclusion about what I believe about it all, so basically, I think those two paths are probably not worth it to me. Maybe my mind will change later, but for now, I am forgetting about them.

Social work is still on the table, same feelings as before.

Getting a job is still on the table, and part of this option would be a sigh of relief. Instead of spending my last year of school prepping for med school and taking all kinds of bio and chem classes, I could take whatever I want, like French, or art, so it would be a year full of fun learning and doing whatever I want. And I wouldn't be so hard on myself about grades if I knew that I wasn't planning to go to grad school. Right now, I treat myself in a way that I'd never treat anyone else about grades, and I know it's unhealthy, but some part of me (uh, let's see - could it be the control freak...or maybe the anal psycho...) refuses to accept anything less than perfection on my transcript, and I think part of it is the pressure of getting into grad school and competing for grants. Anyway, it would be a relief to have that burden lifted.

Then finally the med school route is on the table, and this is the one really wracking my brain. I want this. But I want other things too. If I were single, no doubt this is what I would do...but I'm married, and we want to have kids in a few years, and med school wants and family wants are not super compatible at this stage in life. I mean, I know it can be done, but something will suffer doing it all, especially with the timing of things. Jesse and I were doing some math yesterday evening thinking over things, and we figure it would be about 2023 when I would finally arrive at my goal - 16 years from now. (I want to specialize in neurosurgery....in short - that's 2 years finishing my bachelor's, 5 years med school, 3 years residency, and 5-6 years fellowship.) That is some commitment. And it's an intensive commitment. Residents easily work 80 hour weeks, sometimes on 30 hour shifts. I watched a friend go through it, and if he actually had time to show up at social events, his face was white, his eyes were glazed, and he was extremely exhausted. I'd be spending so much time away from home. It would be hard on Jesse and I. I know we could make it, but is it worth it? And kids...no way I could just squeeze in a pregnancy or two during this training and keep at it, but waiting 16 years to have kids? By that stage in my life, it would be a greater risk for both my health and the baby's health. We have talked about adoption, and Jesse is an amazingly supportive husband and has said that he would quit his job to stay home with kids if I wanted to pursue med school, but even then, would my kids not really know their mom for the first few years of their life because she's always away at the hospital? Is that really worth it? If I were single, heck yea, I'd go for this, but with it being such a big commitment, I can't just jump in and not think about how it will affect both my future, and Jesse's future, and about what things in life I'd need to give up in order to pursue this.

I know I don't need to figure out all of these answers today or even tomorrow, but I do need to decide somewhat, as the rest of my undergrad classes will be dictated by what I plan to do upon graduation. All in all, I don't want to decide to get something today that will prevent me from getting what I want tomorrow.

PhD's and stuff

I highly considered posting a poll on here to let all of you decide my future...well okay not really, but I did consider a poll. I have 5 options upon graduation that I am looking at. I know I don't graduate until another year and a half (bare minimum), possibly 2 years - the timing depends on how many hours my financial aid will cover each semester. Right now, it's covering the max that I can take, but I also just took out yet another loan. Anyway, so I know I have time to decide, but the thing is, what I do upon graduation may impact what classes I need to be taking right now (like grad school requirements and such), so it's been on my mind a lot since I possibly need to be planning and acting now to prepare for some of the paths. Anyway, in a nutshell, here are the options I am considering:

Get a job. This one is probably the least appealing right now, not because I don't want to work, actually I'd love to be ready to enter the workfield again right away, but it's quite arguable that all the things I really want to do require more schooling, so unless a dream job happens to open up that I could get with only a bachelor's, then this isn't the most appealing option for now.

Get a masters in social work - again, not the most appealing, but the pluses are that it would only be 2 more years of school instead of 4 or 5 for PhD programs, and there are plenty of job opportunities, and it appeals to the anal organizer in me. (By the way, when I say social work, I mean hospital social work, not child welfare stuff.)

Get a PhD in clinical psychology. See, when you go into psychology everyone automatically assumes you want to counsel people and analyze them and all of this, despite what your emphasis is...there are like fifty million different types of psychology, (human factors, I/O, child, social, developmental, clinical, educational...it goes on and on), but the most well known is probably counseling psychology, and thus I think most people assume all psychologists do this. Anyway, point is, I don't want to counsel people and theories of personality and what not have never been that appealing to me. I am more interested in the clinical and biological side.

Get a PhD in cognitive neuroscience. "Cognitive neuroscience" is just a fancy word for studying how the brain processes info and how the nervous system works. This option is quite appealing to me, but the drawback is that I am afraid it might limit my job options to research or teaching...and I'm afraid most of the research jobs lie within the pharmaceutical industry, which I'm not super keen to jumping on board with.

Finally, med school, and specialize in neurology. But, the medical thing is risky...it sounds very good to me, but I really need to think through the fullness of it and the details. Jesse was talking with me about all of this the other day and said "well do you think you could cut through a skull and operate?" Not saying I'd necessarily be a brain surgeon, but that option is appealing to me. I mean, I know any PhD program will be hard work, but the med one seems hardest to me, not because of the classes, but just the responsibility of it. I mean, it's one thing to be in a lab and studying the nervous system via petri dishes or with volunteers who sign up to be in a study by their own free will, but it's quite another to be responsible for helping a person get healthy and well, especially if it involves their brain.

Part of me wonders if I can even do any of these options (well, besides a and b...I can definitely get a job and I could definitely get a master's in social work, but the others, I wonder if I have what it takes.) With PhD programs, I have to be chosen to even begin the classes, not like these are all sure options. Am I making sure I have enough experience now, am I taking the right classes to show that I would be a good PhD candidate, could I do well on the MCAT or the GRE, and even if I get in, do I have what it takes to finish? All of these options have the potential for me to fail miserably and part of me even cringes publicly posting what I'm considering, because you always have two voices in your head, one says you can do it and the other laughs and says "who are you kidding?" and you are never quite sure what to believe and sometimes you have to wonder if it's obvious to the world that you don't have what it takes, but no one is kind enough to tell you so.

Geez, where is Simon Cowell when I really need him most?!

Photos Again!

I really miss the Macasaurus. This Windows Vista deal makes it a lot harder to get my photos figured out. Guess I just need to get used to it.

Anyway, I haven't blogged about the garden in quite some time, so it's that time again. Tonight we went out to pick our sugar snap peas, and Jesse noticed that we have little tiny baby tomatoes already! We got a load of peas. I will have to freeze some. I don't think we can eat them all in the next few days. Here is the loot:

And of course, it's back to the bathroom. A reminder of the "before":


And this isn't an "official" after photo, because we still aren't done. Still have trim, a bit more grout, a bit more caulk, touch ups, and finding a bath mat, and getting some stuff on the walls...but you can get the idea pretty well at this point:


It's so nice having it back together! No more hauling pee cups out to the compost pile! (Although, apparently, urine is one of the best things for compost...high in nitrogen...and as I found out, there are many other various forms of human waste that are quite beneficial to the earth. It gets pretty gory - you would not imagine what some people on the garden forum I read are willing to do to get nice plants. Yikes! Anyway, rest assured, if you eat any of our plants, the only crap they will have on them is from the birds.

Busy

It was a very busy week here, but hopefully productive as well. We took N to the zoo on Thursday, and it was fun, but exhausting! Even N was worn out. I've never seen that. At one point, he asked "Can we just stop and rest for a minute?" Then he told us he was going to go to bed by 8:30 and sleep very well. And this is from the kid who usually wants to sprint and race everywhere! In any case, my legs are still recovering. I don't think we'll do many more zoo trips. I wasn't too impressed with the facilities that many of the animals are in. I don't think zoos are bad, as long as all the animals needs are met...and here, I had to wonder about many of them. Some just looked bored out of their minds, and others who generally roam for miles in the wild had a space smaller than our house to live in. I am sure that anyone who goes into zoology must have a love for animals, so hopefully my judgements are far off from the truth.

I would post some photos of the bathroom, which is nearly complete. (We've got some grout haze to wipe off the floor, some paint touch ups and a few other small things like hanging up the toilet paper holder and some wall decor.) But, with all this new PC business, I have to find our card reader that fits a PC, and am still lamenting the loss of Photoshop, as we owned the Mac-only version. That program will be greatly missed. We are still kind of hoping Mac will fix the laptop for us, but are bracing ourselves for the worst. Anyway, all that to say, I don't know where the card reader for the PC is, and I will have to figure out what kind of basic little program we can install on here to do some photo resizing and such before I will be able to post any other photos. Once the house is cleaned up from the bathroom remodel, it will be easier to find. This project has spilled everywhere! We've got stuff on the back deck, tools in the office, a bucket of mastic in the hallway, the old cabinets in the kitchen, and I am not even going to discuss the status of our garage.

I got to use the reciprocating saw for the first time yesterday, and that was quite enjoyable. Jesse wasn't home, so I did a few "test saws" into the air to see how it feels, then prayed that I wasn't doing something totally stupid, and went at it. I only had to make two very small cuts, but none the less, I was proud of myself for not sawing off something that I wasn't supposed to, and for not shedding any blood. Jesse says the reciprocating saw is the "manliest of all saws", but it is not nearly as scary to me as the wet saw. I think I measure level of scariness based upon how close my hands have to be to the blade, so that explains it. Anyway, I also hooked up the sink by myself, which to anyone who knows about plumbing, knows that isn't really a big deal, but I've never done anything with any plumbing - Jesse has been taking care of that aspect of this project. So, I was proud that I got the vanity in, got the sink put on, and got it all hooked up with not one water leak in sight! (Now let's just hope it stays that way.)

Anyway, once this place is cleaned up, I'll get some photos on here. In the meantime, I need to check in on some school work!

More Bathroom

The bathroom is getting there...and we are tired. We decided that today will be a no bathroom work day. Jesse got home from "regular" work not too long ago and is napping. I might join him soon. Last night we had thunderstorms, which means Abe was up all night, which means I was up all night.


Jesse got all of the plumbing finished up, so we put on the last of the cement board and I finished up the tiling.


We bought a cheap wet saw that came in very handy, although it was groaning a lot toward the end.


Yesterday we were able to grout. That means we just need to caulk and let that dry, then we can finally have a regular shower again!

The bathroom has pretty much occupied all of our time outside of work lately. I feel like the shower was the major hurdle, and now it's easier/smaller stuff left...although nothing is ever as easy as it's supposed to be in the world of house projects! We just need to paint, tile the floor, put in the vanity and sink, and change out the wall cabinet. Hopefully we can have it wrapped up within a week or so. This week coming up is pretty busy though, so I'm trying to be realistic.

We are taking N to the zoo this week, so that should be fun. I am excited to see the sea lion show. Jesse had another shift bid at work unfortunately...we now have just one day off together. (Which is still much better than when we had no days together, so I'm not complaining!)

Anyway, that's life for now...bathroom, work and school!

Today

It has been a day full of bathroom work. I am just pausing for a bit while Jesse fits in one more pipe. Kind of a one man job, and our bathroom is small enough that I figured I should just get out of the way until he's done....then back to it! Here's a few photos of the progress...



Cleaning up so we can finally bring in the new bathtub! (What you did not see on the "before photos" were the scratches and brown stains all over the bottom and sides of the old tub.)


Yeah!! Seven water leaks and forty-two profanities later, the tub is in!


Jesse decided to take advantage of the brief thunderstorm we had. (This is day three without a shower for us.)


Thinking about tiling, with the help of Abe of course.


While Abe likes to be part of the action, Horton is a little unsure of the banging and noise. He has been hiding out by his bed all day long.

Slowly making tile progress...


Shew! It's hard work supervising all of these projects!

Bathroom Bonanza

The bathroom project is finally under way! Jesse has been working like a mad dog the last couple days. I have unfortunately not been able to partake yet, as I've been either at work or when at home, needing to work on school. I worked very hard today to get my assignments turned in so that I can have all day tomorrow to help in the bathroom and I am looking forward to it. It's been really hard to focus on school knowing that fun house projects are going on just a few feet away. Anyway, it's been going (fairly) well so far...a few glitches in the system here and there. It's usually not a good thing when you wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of gushing water, as happened last night. The hot water valve popped off, which consequently sent water spewing straight out into the bathroom...poor Jesse, I think I scared the crap out of him. I woke up first, yelling "JESSE!!! WATER!!!" and we both went flying out of bed. Thankfully, little damage was done (outside of stealing our much needed beauty rest). =)


Before Photo A.


Before Photo B.


The wonderful discovery of mold growing all over the insulation and studs.


Jesse sporting his brand new respirator (courtesy of the mold discovery) while hacking away at where the tub used to be.


Coach Abe steps in to give Jesse a pep talk.

I'm a Rat

I just finished cleaning the house and thought it would be nice to waste spend some time on the computer relaxing. I checked my e-mail, but have none. I check my e-mail way too many times a day. I'm like a rat. They have done those studies where the rats get hooked more on pressing a lever or whatever if the cheese comes not 100% of the time, but inconsistently. Thus, I'm the rat and the e-mail is my cheese.

In any case, after checking e-mail, checking to see if anyone updated their blogs, and then reading an article on msn about mothers and nannies, I decided I'd blog, even though I don't have anything in particular to say.

Another semester starts on Monday. Minority Group Relations, Theories of Personality, and I'm finally biting the bullet and taking my last gen ed math class. 9 hours in 8 weeks will make June and July go by very fast. It's all about perspective, which I am delightfully wonderful at losing....we'll see how it goes.

I got the herb bed repaired and am now trying to figure out where to plant some flower seeds. I'm running out of time, as the weather is warming up fast. I should go out there tonight and figure out a plan. We are swimming in lettuce. I pick some, we eat some, and then I go back out and double has grown in its place. I hope that happens to the tomatoes. The pea vines are finally blooming, so hopefully we can start picking them soon.

We are finally starting in on the bathroom this Tuesday. This project has been delayed and delayed for various reasons. I'm excited to finally get going on it. Not so excited about the part where we will have no toilet or shower in our house though. We'll cross that hurdle when we get there I guess.

Well, I suppose I have spent enough time on the computer for now. I should go get some yardwork done.

A Few Words Before Bed...

The last two days have been interesting, as many people have read and responded to Jesse’s blog post about his experience and feelings in regards to the US and Canada. There have been various responses from anger to indifference to agreement. While I could spout my own opinion here and explain the reasoning behind Jesse saying that I have been “deeply hurt” by this issue, that is not the intent of this post. If anyone wants to know any more about either of those, I’m an open book for the asking and would be happy to chat about it. However, in this post I only have one thing to say.

My husband is the most proud Canadian that I know. He loves his country deeply and would never ever deny it. It takes courage and great strength to live in a country that’s not your own and to walk squarely in the middle of two cultures, that while on the surface may look alike, but are in actuality, quite different. It takes even more courage to face the truth of those two cultures and see them in their entirety - flaws and strengths - and to in turn, love them both none the less. He has done this with grace and courage and I am proud of him.

Judging him for doing so is far more offensive to me than judging my country.

Good night.

Tsk Tsk Tsk...

I love our big burly Abe very much, but he sure keeps me on my toes. Saturday evening Jesse and I were winding down. As I passed the kitchen window and looked out, I noticed Abe laying outside very happy and cozy...in one of the raised beds. He had dug out a little spot in the corner for himself and was sitting on it like a king on his throne. Of course he got into big trouble, (but it also gave us a good laugh). It just had to be the bed that I had sowed all of my herbs seeds and starts into a week or so ago. Now, if anything even comes up, with his digging, I will probably have cilantro in the middle of my basil or oregano in the middle of my rosemary! Plus, the little start of lemon balm from my grandma was buried. I have it on my list to repair and resow this week. Abe is like a pouty child and he needs to feel loved. I am pretty sure the only reason he got into the bed was in rebellion to having Riley here. Not only has he had to share his attention, but Riley also walked across this very bed the day he arrived here. I yelled at him, and he learned his lesson to stay out, but I am sure Abe could smell Riley all over it. I think this was Abe's way of claiming his territory and asserting that he is the king around this house! Anyway, after Jesse got Abe out of the bed, he grabbed the camera and got a shot of his muddy little nose.

More From the Deck

I am ambivalent about doubt. I know I shouldn't doubt, but I also know that God is gracious to me and speaks louder and stronger when I do the same. I love the story of Job, even if only for the fact that he shot off his mouth and God was proud in the end. I think it gives me hope. I am a reserved person, but my opinions are strong, and I have a habit of telling God off.

A few days ago, I was in awe of what wonderful bosses God has given me. Mike (back at Zephyr) was so good to me. He not only gave me great raises, but he listened to me and did everything in his power to make sure that I woke up and wanted to come into work each day. Especially toward the end, when he knew I was considering leaving, he made it incredibly hard for me to leave. And the best thing about working for him was that he made me do things not just to shape my keyboarding skills or organizational system, but that actually shaped my character too. I know there were problems at the company and some days I wanted to walk out the door. I know it wasn't the perfect job, but I also know that few people get to experience a boss who treats them as well as Mike treated me. And now my current boss recently gave me a small raise for no real reason that I can see and overall he just pays me really high for what I do. I certainly don't deserve it, considering all I really do is answer a few phone calls, check out a few customers, and every few days, add up some numbers. I have just had bosses be really good to me and the last few days I've been very thankful for that.

Then, today it was all confirmed that I really have had the privilege of working for great guys (my feminist heart is waiting for the day I work under a great gal - or better yet, get to be that great gal!). My boss is giving me 35 bucks bonus on my next paycheck to "go out to eat with your husband because I know it can be hard" (meaning trying to get financial things in line when you are young). I am a very blessed person to have a boss who even considers things like that. It meant so much to me, not only the extra cash and being able to have a nice dinner out, but just with doubting and worrying over money, it just confirmed that God does take care of His own, and made me want to well up in tears at how much I have in my life. But of course, I can't cry at work, so I smiled and said thank you and then spent the next four hours worrying over whether I had expressed enough gratitude or not in trying to suppress my true emotion of wanting to cry and dramatically say "You don't know how much this means!". I just didn't know what to say and even now, I worry that I somehow failed to get across my gratitude.

Anyway, then I got home and got the mail, and we got a (small) dividend check from our insurance company. Now, the dividend won't magically make the checkbook show black instead of red, and going out for a nice dinner won't suddenly make the upcoming vet bill smaller, but they both sure do go a long way in making my heart feel very full today. And in the stubborn and sarcastic way that I relate to God, I can just picture that this was His way of telling me off for doubting His provisions.

Okay I need to come back to this blogging because it's starting to thunder and Abe is getting scared and slobbering all over the keyboard. Mmmm. Time to go inside.

Thoughts from The Back Deck

We are dog-sitting for my mom while she is on vacation. I love her dog. Riley is a border collie, and as a pre-psychology professional, I have officially diagnosed him with obsessive compulsive disorder. The obsession being frisbees and balls, and the compulsion being tossing them at my feet every three seconds. As I type this, he is pushing the frisbee nearer and nearer my feet (which are now covered in slobber), and he has grass blades hanging off of his head and spit bubbles all over his eyebrows (don't know how he managed that one). He is the most loveable misfit ever created and no matter how I am feeling, Riley can always make me smile and let me know that everything is going to be just fine. Today it is a welcome reminder.

The last few days have thrown a lot of financial hurdles at us, and I know money doesn't buy happiness, but at times like this, I do feel there is an awful lot to be said for it! The crowning glory of all of these little mishaps here and there was yesterday when one of our tires blew out. Great. Add that to the list of ever growing unexpected expenses! Oh well, the very fact that I have to pay for a new tire means that I own a car which means that this problem is a luxury. All of them are actually...health care costs mean I have access to what I need to keep myself and my family (dogs included!) healthy, vehicle expenses mean I can go where I want when I want, electric, gas and water bills means I have a clean, safe place to sleep at night. All of which are things to be very thankful for. And I am. But the problem is, I don't only feel thankful. I also feel sad. I also wonder if we will ever get ahead financially. I also wonder if we are doing something wrong.

The thing is, I don't regret my life, and I am pretty confident Jesse doesn't either. We both know that had we gone to college straight out of high school, we'd probably be in a lot better place financially, but who would we be as people? The experiences I had in lieu of college shaped me deeper than any curriculum, and I would never, have never, wished that I'd done something differently. There is such a warm place of deep, deep satisfaction in my heart when I remember the Philippines, or Kona, or Israel.... I'll never forget how proud I was of Jesse seeing him lead the team in Nicaragua, and I'll always laugh when I remember the night that the bat flew into our room and "tried to kill him".

But where does all of this leave us now, and how does our past fit into our present? It's not just the money - that's the most tangible way it all comes out, but it's much more than that. It's all been on my mind a lot lately, and although I enjoy my life now, I wonder if I have missed something along the way. The thing is, I am not even sure what I want. I used to know so clearly, but now I haven't really the slightest idea...but sometimes, like now, I feel like I am closer to knowing than I ever was when I "knew" - does that make sense?

Does the Painting Ever End?

Sherwin Williams was having a 30% off sale yesterday, so Jesse and I decided to go ahead and buy the paint that we will need for the bathroom. I also recently decided that we should paint the kitchen cabinets. I have never really liked them, but they are nice, custom cabinets and I felt bad messing with them. Then I figured, what does it even matter if they are nice if I don't like them and it's my house? Might as well change them to how I like them. That painting project will happen after the bathroom remodel, and hopefully all of the painting will be done after that. We should have invested in a paint sprayer long, long ago. It would have well paid off by now. Anyway, for the kitchen cabinets, we chose "biscuit" (middle color). The bathroom, we are painting the vanity "french roast" (bottom left) and the walls will be "jalapeno" (bottom right). Tiles are all neutral beigey-whitish colors. At first I thought about just painting the walls a cream color and then doing the ceiling in jalapeno for a little change, but I don't know if I'd like the cream on the walls up against all of our white trim, so we'll just stick with keeping the color on the walls. Although, I am hoping to possibly redo our bedroom a bit, and I'd really like to put the color on the ceiling in there.



Anyway, other than house projects, it's mainly just work and school. I am at that plateau with school. No longer new and novel, but still a ways to go. Struggling with what I want out of it, what my goals are and where I'm heading. For now, all I know to do is just keep doing what I'm doing now and hopefully one day I will know more specifically what I want. I've definitely narrowed it down since I started, which is good, but I'm almost afraid I'm narrowed it out too much, which makes me question my path all together. Work is work...I'm trying to pick up some extra shifts, especially during my break between semesters and keep hoping we can catch up enough to start throwing pennies at our vacation fund. Guess that's where the faith and trust part comes in. Last Sunday, our pastor (and I use that term very loosely), mentioned something along the lines of not being able to have faith without doubt and struggle, meaning being sure doesn't take much faith; it really comes when the most doubt is there, yet acting despite it is what truly constitutes faith....at least that's how I interpreted it, and now that I think about it, what he said really didn't even go like that at all, so who knows what he was really trying to say, but what I gathered was just that - being sure doesn't take faith...being full of doubt does... Who knows. Maybe I just twisted it to make myself feel better. This year has been very full of doubt for me, in every arena....my purpose and path, my beliefs, Christ, God - you name it, I am probably doubting it this very second!

In any case, I will wrap this up and try to start winding down. We try our best to go to bed early since Jesse leaves for work well before the crack of dawn now. It's awfully hard in the summer when the sun is out shining, just calling us to be outdoors though!

The Swing

We've been getting a lot of use out of our anniversary present. A couple weeks ago, Horton discovered that it's a very comfy spot to curl up on. He won't go onto it if we aren't on it, because he has figured out that it moves and isn't too sure how to work with it unless we hold it steady for him. However, the minute one of us sits down, he very happily trots over and jumps right up. Abe just discovered the comfy swing yesterday (with a wee bit of coaxing). He didn't want to get off of it when it was time to go inside. We had to bribe him with some treats.

Another Adventure

I used to think getting the bathroom done was the next priority for us in house projects, but I think the fence may have been bumped up. Horton found his way out yet again this morning. That's 3 times in the last month, despite Jesse having put in metal bars where the fence was loose and he got out the last 2 times. There must be a new spot that he found. So, this round, I was inside making toast. I carried it to the back deck to eat outside with the dogs, who were already out there. There's Abe...but where's Horton?? I run back inside and through the front door to get into the Passport to drive around. As I'm opening the car door, a neighbor who lives a few doors down yells to me..."I think your dog is out. He's over there playing with that German Shepard." and points. So I yell thanks and take off in that direction. I pass the German Shepard, and Horton has moved on to another spot. I turn down another road and suddenly hear dogs barking behind me, so I put it in reverse slowly looking to see if they are barking because Horton is running loose. Then 2 women come out of their houses and yell "Are you looking for your dog? He's over there." and point. I look over, and there he is...yet another neighbor comes out, sees me panicky as I yell "My dog got out!" and then she sees Horton, so she kindly walks toward him talking nicely, and he trots over to sniff her. I notice he's behind a fence though, so the lady tells me the fence is open on the other side of the house. She kept talking nice to Horton to keep his attention until I was able to run around the house to call him. I get him loaded back up, and as I'm driving back up to our house, there is the first neighbor that helped me out, now mowing his yard, and as I drive by I see him smile as he yells "Ah! You got him!" triumphantly. Thankfully Horton is safe and sound (although he has lost all of his "go outside alone" privileges!)....and I do say, today reinforced the fact that I do like our neighborhood. Everyone seems to know the "2 big golden dogs" and just who they belong with! It was very sweet, especially to see the 2 different women who ran out their front doors when they saw me drive by, just to help me locate one of the hairy loves of my life! I hope I at least yelled "thank you" somewhere in there!

The Yard

I finally got some photos to post!

You would think the grass would make a softer pillow than the rock...


My favorite flowers in our yard are almost in bloom.


This is another area we filled with rock...not too interesting, but it was hard work!


Jesse is building yet another raised bed for me.

We'll have 4 total raised beds and I still don't know where I will plant everything! (Notice the back left bed is nice and green...that's peas, radishes, and lettuce!)

Abe likes to supervise our projects for quality control. He is SO helpful.

Nothing In Particular

I mowed the yard and as I was coming in, I thought it would be nice to take some photos of the other landscape stuff we've done, and the dogs, and of course my garden (just because it inflates my ego). However, I grabbed the camera and the battery was dead. So I dug through Jesse's photo bag and found another. It was dead. I repeated that twice, and finally gave up. Time to charge the batteries and then I will try to get some photos on here.

Speaking of garden, this year I have been thinking about how it relates to my faith. As I was planting the seeds a month or however long ago, looking at them I realized how much faith is in them. That probably doesn't make sense. I just mean that if we didn't know anything about science or how stuff works, and someone came up to us and handed us one seed and said "Here. Take this. This is going to feed you for the rest of your life", we'd think they were nuts. How could a thing like that feed us? It looks as if it wouldn't even make a dent in our tummy one time, yet somehow, it has the capacity to feed us for as long as we live. I guess since we know how seeds grow and work, it kind of takes the faith out of it, but still, it's just interesting to me how easily we overlook small miracles like that.

I've also been thinking about how even in death, things have a purpose. With the compost for example, the slow decaying of once living matter is what in turns feeds the now living matter. Everything has a purpose and fits into this grand plan. Even bugs and worms, I have just fallen in love with them. Without them, I couldn't grow anything in the soil. In that way, we're somehow intertwined and dependent on these little things that we so easily smush. But the worm and the bugs work the soil and give it nutrition in a way that I will never be able to. It's very fascinating to me. It just reminds me that God knows what He's doing and that everything truly does work together for a plan and a purpose, even in death...I forget that really often.

Anyway, it's been a fun garden season so far, much better than last year, when I got a whopping one tomato, and two midget bell peppers. I'm glad it's spring and am looking forward to the summer, and would actually love if it just stuck around all year, but I do have one thing I am looking forward to when fall comes. I thought about this a lot last winter, but never did it, and decided I definitely should this fall. I want to have a "take it bake it" or a "soup swap". (The idea's not mine. Comes from Not Martha, and I think she got the idea somewhere else too.) In any case, the deal is that you spend one day making a lot of soup - then you divide it up into 6 or so 2 quart containers. You bring it to the party, and then everyone goes in rounds picking soups that they want to go home with. So you spend one day cooking one thing, and go home with however many different soups that you can just pop on the stove when you having a busy night and can't cook. The "take it bake it" party is the same idea, only you aren't limited to soups. You could make anything that freezes well - pies, lasagna, whatever. I think the take it bake it might be more interesting. I think it sounds really fun and very practical as well. Cook one night and get a week's worth of food. However, I don't know how well it will go over or who exactly I would invite that would also think it's fun. I imagine some people wouldn't think it's fun to cook that much one day. Plus, I'll have to think wisely about freeze space. We have a deep freeze, so it would be no problem for us, but I guess it may be hard for those who only have a regular freeze. I'll try and see...worst case no one comes and we have a lot of soup or lasagna or something!

Well, anyway all this food talk is making me hungry!

For the Love

Today Horton got out of the yard and gave me a freak out attack. This is the first time he's ever gotten out in this house, and it's been our big fear, because we live not too far off of a major road. The few times he got out in Colorado, he always came trotting back to the house within an hour, so I tried to tell myself not to worry. That doesn't really work though, because I keep thinking about how fast cars go on that road, and about this couple who lost their dog in our neighborhood last fall, and the poor little lost dog signs are still up today. I want to drive around the neighborhood and see if I can find him, but I am car-less today (another story for another day). So I grab Abe, and we trot down to the end of the street by the major road. Thankfully, no dead dog in sight...but still no live dog either. So we head back up toward the house, and I'm starting to cry, wondering what I will ever do if I never see my little Horton again. This lady out in her yard tries to start up a conversation with me and I probably seemed rude, but at the time I didn't care because my little doggie is missing. So Abe and I make it back to the house. (I was encouraging him to pee on everything in site so that Horton would catch Abe's smell and it would be easier for him to find his way home.) So I'm resigned that I just have to stay in the house and wait, but in the meantime, I am worried. So I call Jesse and start leaving him this hysterical ridiculous voicemail. Then, as I'm looking out the window, a few blocks over, I see a glimpse of golden. I hang up the phone, and go sprinting outside running that direction. I'm totally out of breath, have little tears on my face and am trying my best to yell and whistle as I run...talk about a freak show. I get to the spot where I thought I saw the furball, and can't see the little pooch anywhere, so I decide might as well keep running toward the direction that I hear dogs barking. I figured maybe they were barking at Horton...so run run I go...finally, I stop, feeling like my jello jiggler legs are just going to collapse, and I see little happy Horton come trotting around the side of someone's house. I yell out his name and he puts on his big smile and comes sprinting over to me and I give him big hugs. Holding his collar, we both run back to the house, and as we are approaching, I can hear Abe just barking away, feeling so left out of this little adventure. Haaaa...that was about two hours ago, and the two dogs have been sleeping ever since.